Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Breastfeeding

I was just reading an article about this mama who didn't breastfeed because firstly she didn't like the feeling and secondly her supply ran dry sooner than she thought.

Well I can reply to her sentiment. I wanted so much to breastfeed little Andrew and God has other plans for me and it didn't happen at all (if I may say).

When I was still in the hospital, the nurse tried to show me how to breastfeed. But when little Andrew was (and still is) hungry, he couldn't wait at all! When I tried to breastfeed him, due to my low supply (trust it was hopelessly low), he just couldn't wait and has not patient in trying to latch on. He would wail and shout and cry when hunger struck (and yes he still is).

On the day I was discharged, little Andrew was already hungry as soon as we got home. And so I tried to breastfeed in my room. Along came my mother-in-law. She came into the room without knocking (or she did and I couldn't hear because of little Andrew cries) while I was trying to let Andrew latched on! OMG!!!! It was such traumatic moment for me! I don't know why I was ok in the hospital when the nurse (a complete stranger) stood there and even helped me to press my breast. But for my mother-in-law to see my exposed boobs was really unexpected and very traumatising for me. I wasn't sure if that traumatising event caused me my breastfeeding function. Is it possible?

Anyway back to trying breastfeeding. I also pumped with the electric breast pump in hope of increasing the flow. Failed.

I tried having those milk tea which claims to help increase your breast milk supply. Well, I must say it kinda helped. You see... before having to try the tea, my supply was 2 drops (sadly it's that little) each time I expressed and none at all when I pump. But after having the tea for a couple of days, my supply increased to... wait for it... 20 drops. Sigh...

I tried to pump or express every time after I bottle feed little Andrew. But the more I tried, the lesser the supply. So I tried once a day and that was when my daily quota of 20 drops fill up more of the tiny container. I still feed the baby with the 20 drops!!!! Better than nothing right?

After a while, the supply was slowly diminishing. Until it was back to 2 drops each time.

To those who can breastfeed their babies, some will never understand why some mummies (like me) just couldn't breastfeed. To some, it came easy. Some tried harder and got the flow working. But there is still some (like me) who just tried every possible way and just couldn't get it to work.

So for all you naysayers out there, be more considerate and don't assume people like us (me) do not breastfeed because we didn't try hard enough.

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