Friday, March 21, 2014

S.T.R.E.S.S.

I had this eczema out of nowhere. And I had 2 serious case of outbreak in a span of 6 months. I never had eczema, not ever. I thought that it might be due to hormone imbalance.

Then these couple of nights, I started to have insomnia. So bad that the other day I didn't sleep a wink, or maybe I did but definitely not more than an hour of sleep in a span of 36 hours! Again I thought that it might be due to the tea that I had.

Tonight made me think about why all these problems. I guess my denial to even think that little Andrew needs help in his development made me stress? I'm not sure.

He still can't talk or say any words that really make sense at 28mo. He kept repeating "bao bei" and lately he will say "mum" for food/milk. But that's about all that he says. Oh one more is "Ahm" when he sees me getting his meal ready. He does babble a lot but not talking and this really made me worried. Well, more of in denial and putting it all to "boys talk later" but how long can I use this excuse right?

And his lack of eye contact... I actually see some improvement but could have been more or better.

I am so worried sick in a way that he is autistic. I know for sure he is not of severe case because he can take instructions though he chose to ignore me sometimes... but another thing that worries me is he sometimes doesn't respond to his name! So you see... accumulative small little gestures, or rather the lack of it, made me stress.

I think I need to look at it more seriously now that he is 28mo. should I seek intervention? should I seek out for child development specialist? I dread the outcome. This has to be the most stressful event of my life!

At the moment, I am trying to work on these issues with little Andrew and am hoping that it will work out. Again I am stressed thinking if I did the right thing, if I've done enough to help him.

I wanted to enroll him to a playgroup so he can interact with other children his age. Will this help him to behave like his peers? Because I can't help thinking maybe I did something wrong somewhere that I'm not showing or teaching him the right way.

Tonight is the first time I felt like bursting into tears. I am holding it back not to! Oh yes I think my stress level is all time high now.