Last shot before the pick-up

Alright. Finally it's time for the last jab. The nurse reminded me over and over again this morning to remember to jab at 11pm SHARP! Making sure I don't miss the window!

Basically this last jab is to make me ovulate in the next 36hours. That is why is it timed as such at by Monday 11am, the timing is perfect for the egg pick up. So here goes!!

Left or Right?

Every morning at 8.30am, I will have 0.02cc of Buserelin, then 150IU of Menopur and 400IU of Puregon. Then at 8.30pm I will have another 0.02cc of Buserelin again.

I have to alternate the Menopur & Puregon, one of the left and the other on the right. Since the Puregon is easier to jab, wherever Puregon goes, Buserelin will go.

So the routine will be:
Mon Morning (L) Buserelin & Puregon (R) Menopur
Mon Night (R) Buserelin
Tue Morning (L) Menopur (R) Buserelin & Puregon
Tue Night (L) Buserelin
Wed, Thurs, Fri... you get the idea.

How do I keep track which is where?

Since I'll have Buserelin 2 a day, I decided to keep track by swapping my diamond ring. Well, the wedding band will never move, so the diamond ring is it. Whenever I have my Buserelin, I will put the diamond ring on that hand. If I see that the diamond ring in on the left hand at night means, I had the Buserelin on the left in the morning. Therefore that night, I will have to jab Buserelin on the right.

Then in the morning, I see diamond ring on right means I had my Puregon + Buserelin on the left yesterday. So this morning will be Puregon + Buserelin will be on the right.

Ingenious right? :)

Puregon is My Weakness

Today is my second Puregon shot and I have yet to master the technique! Hmmm... Well, the needle is extremely sharp so jabbing with it is not an issue at all. But it's when I tried to push the plunger that needs a bit more of a practice. I'm not asking for more jab but I'm pretty sure I have a couple more shots to go after my next visit to Dr F.

Not quite the piece of cake

21st Feb is my first day to have 3 jabs in the morning, though I've had Busereline & Menopur before, Puregon is new to me. This time the pen used to administer the Puregon is different from the one used for Gonal F (though both is just as expensive!) The first 2 jab was still piece of cake... when it's time for Puregon, I realised the needle was longer and thicker @_@ I thought to myself, it's ok. Boy was I wrong!!! Well, going in was easy since the needle was really sharp, but I had problem pressing the plunger! Alamak! So I had to release my pinch to hold the Puregon pen while the other hand used to press the plunger. The releasing was ok, no problemo... until I retract the pen. This is when the pain comes. Not quite sure why, but heck it was painful. Maybe because I released the "pinch" before I administer the jab. Let's do this again tomorrow!

Piece of Cake

This morning is my first jab after the first failed attempt. And it was really piece of cake. I only need to jab 0.02cc with the smallest needle you can find in the drug store! And here goes the process: Swap, draw med, check for air bubble, pinch and jab. See piece of cake right?

I'm thankful that I am not afraid of needles otherwise i cannot imagine how will I get through this. Some will enrol the help of the Hubby but mine is so frightful of needles that he will probably jab me with his eyes close! So, yes, I am eternally grateful to Him for this!

Since my morning jab is 8.30am, I will maintain morning jab at 8.30am and the evening on will try to get it administered at 8.30pm (12 hours apart).

Sunday= last bumbum jab

Today is my last (I hope) Pregnyl and Proluton jab. But the Cyclogest is not ending anytime soon. That will probably be determine by Friday when I go see Dr F. I felt less stretch internally and less bloated. I don't know if that is some sort of sign of what is to come. But I'm still staying in bed moist of the time, walk like an old woman... I totally believe my hormone is running high coz I'm feeling a sensitive?

Doctors and nurses will tell you not to think too much, but how not to when this is one of the biggest moment of your life where you gave in 200% of your time, effort, emotion, physically, EVERYTHING!! I tried not to think too much but seriously, how can I not when I'm not doing much lately besides staying in bed most of the time!!!!! Everyone keeps telling me walk less, stay in bed, walk slowly, don't go to work... sigh and Dr F said just go about with my daily routine!?!?

Sorry for being TMI, I've not poop for 2 days now :( I need to work hard on this subject!!!

Well, just a few more days to go till Friday.

Progesterone-d

I realised that both my once-in-3-days jabs are also progesterone based medication. I feel so progesterone-d. There are so many hormones involved in the whole process that it's back to biology class all over again!

I read that Progesterone increases during the Luteal phase (post ovulation phase) and it helps to support the gestation period (the carrying of the embryo or fetus during pregnancy). Looks like besides having to consume all these Progesterone, there is nothing much I can do during these 2 weeks of waiting.

Bumbum painpain

Today, besides having my Cyclogest at 11am, I need to have additional 2 jabs. One of which had to be done by a nurse or doctor. I went to a normal clinic nearby for the jab, brought my Proluton along, only to be turned away by the doctor!!!! I have a supporting document about my jabs and he refused to do it for me! The irony is, the clinic performs BOTOX injection!! Whatever~~~~~

So I ended up going to another clinic to have my Proluton jab.

When the nurse inserted the needle, I was like "hmmm... ok. This is not as painful as I thought it would have been." When the nurse pushed the solution in, I wasn't feeling a thing. Great! But this was only short moment of bliss... As I was walking out the clinic to the car, I felt that same super inhumane pain on my bumbum!!! Oh my oh my... the pain lingers on for a couple of hours. Well, looks like tonight I won't be sleeping on my right.

Mother of All Jab!!!

Last night at 11pm sharp, I had my last jab (hopefully it stays that way)! But it wasn't an easy jab because it was a huge a** jab with the sharpest needle you've ever seen! I was too freaked out by the needle that I didn't even get the name of it to update here!!

Nonetheless, I toughen myself and jab on the left where I think so far it's the easiest spot to go it.

And because I was preoccupied by the huge a** needle, I forgot to "warm up" my solution. Normally what I would do is, I'll always warm up the solution by rolling it with my 2 palms. Since I forgot to do it, cold = pain............

Maybe I was on adrenalin high, I couldn't really feel any pain when I poke the needle in or when I inject the solution. Hahahaha. I was all too happy that it was my last needle! After the jab, I was so tired that I couldn't keep my eyes open. I curled up in bed and fell asleep almost instantly!

Understanding my jab meds

As mentioned in earlier posting, I have 3 types of jab meds daily. In the morning, I have Suprefact Buserelin, Gonal-f and Menopur. Then in the afternoon, I have my Buserelin again.

My dosage for Suprefact Buserelin is 0.02ml each time. The active ingredient of Buserelin, which is a type of medicine known as a gonadorelin (LHRH) analogue. It reacts to the pituitary gland in the brain - where it stores various hormones, including the LH (Luteinising Hormone - surges when the follicles mature and subsequently contributes to the release of the egg from the ovary) & FSH. In this case, the LHRH is used to control the release of both LH & FSH hormones.

My dosage of Gonal-f starts at 300IU/0.5ml for the first 4 days, and now increased to 375IU, which is 0.625ml for the next 3 days. The Gonal-f contains pure FSH (Follicle Stimulating Hormone - used in the development of follicles).

And lastly the Menopur. This is slightly complicated... I need to inject 2 bottles of Menopur everyday. Each contains 75IU of FSH and 75IU of LH, and since it comes in powder form, it requires insulin to dilute. I normally inject 0.30ml into each Menopur container, and I'll get about 0.55ml of liquified Menopur.

The amount or dosage of hormone injection varies from person to person. My first cycle was underestimated, and the dosage was already different. So, this is NOT a guide to anyone as a dosage intake but rather the understanding of what I am injecting myself with.

Understanding the hormones in me

I have been giving myself with 3 jabs a day, and these jabs are basically hormones: Follicle Stimulating Hormone (FSH) and Luteinizing Hormone (LH). Both FSH & LH increase the number of growing follicles and subsequently stimulating their development.

With FSH, it increases the production of oestrogen and under the influence of hormone the largest follicle continues to grow and develop. And when the oestrogen increases, it triggers a surge of LH, which results in final maturation and the release of the egg from the ovary.

I hope I got the understanding right... during my next visit, I shall verify my writing with Dr F :)

Dating my Gonal-F

Gonal-F is very expensive and I have to use one whole pen each time. During my IUI, I only need to administer 75IU, but now I have to use up the whole pen of 300IU! And so far, I have used more than 10! Yes, IVF is expensive.

Since it is expensive, I was told by Dr F that there are always "leftover" in the Gonal-F pen. I never realise it until then. So, whenever I finished one pen, I had to keep the pen and bring whatever I have with me to the clinic during my next visit. So the nurse can extract and collect the leftovers from the pen, and put it into a syringe. The other time, the nurse extracted 3 leftover pens which equivalent to ONE new Gonal-F!

I have 8 with me now, and will be going to see the doctor in a short while!

Oh and also, I keep track on the date I've used them. I wouldn't want to use back a pen that is dated like a year ago! So I always stick a sticker to the plunger and "date" my Gonal-F.

Keeping up with the jabs

I have been very discipline with all my jab time, morning at 8.40am, afternoon at 3.40pm. Well, the morning jabs are ok since that's about the time I get up in the morning. But afternoon... I thought very hard as to what is the best time to have my jab. I could have done it in the evening say 8pm, but the movie-bug reminded me that if I do 8pm means I don't get to go for movie for a long-long time.... Then if I do it at night say 11pm means it's more than 12 hours. So... why 3.40pm? On my first day, I decided, ok 6 hours after morning jab which is 2.30pm.... but I reached home an hour late, so from then on 3.40pm everyday.

I also have a journal of my jabs, and it looks like this:
16/9 8.40am - Buserelin (R)
16/9 3.40pm - Buserelin (L)

17/9 8.40am - Buserelin (R), Gonal-F (L), Menopur (R)
17/9 3.40pm - Buserelin (L)

18/9 8.40am - Buserelin (R), Gonal-F (R), Menopur (L)
18/9 3.40pm - Buserelin (L)

You see.. since I have to jab so many jabs left right left right... so to even them out, I've got to remember which goes where on what date!

All my jabs...

I store all my medicine to jabs in a mid-size Tupperware to be kept in the fridge - making sure it's fresh! HAHA! The main reason I kept it in the Tupperware is to make sure all my meds are in one place and easy storage purpose.

The pen-like thingie, is my Gonal-F. The one (not visible) in the box is my busereline. And the vials are my Menopur.

Every morning, I'll take my meds out from the fridge, let it "thaw" a bit. Dr F said sometimes I feel the pain when I inject is because the "cold solution" being injected. The censor below the skin can only feel pain, and not cold. So anything else is PAIN. Pretty interesting fact!

This is how many jabs I had to administer myself:










This is the mess after:

Day 13 of Jab

It has been 13 days of smooth sailing. I hope. My schedule is waking up daily at 8am(well, sometimes 15mins later due to late night watching World Cup...), even before I clean up myself, I will tip-toed to the fridge to grab my solution and walked back up. My gear:

- My supply of alcohol-soaked cotton
- 1ml Syringe (which I only need .5)
- 5.5ml Suprefact



I might have become the expert in drawing the .5ml (well, maybe sometimes .53ml or . 58ml)from the bottle - without bubble. I've mastered the technique after 11 days. YES, after 11 tries, I finally got it perfect without having to draw it and only to release it and then do it many many many times to get rid of the smallest tiniest air bubble.

Well, you see... You are suppose to remove the cap from the syringe, and pull the plunger and push it again to release all the air. And then you insert the needle to the bottle to draw the solution. Sounds easy right? NOT! Each time you pull the plunger, you will see air bubble forming. Then you have to push it all back in again... Dang... Everytime I had to repeat the steps over and over again.

Well because the quality of the syringe is a bit (ahem) elcheapo so even after pushing the plunger to the edge, there is bound to be some bit of air that is still stuck. So, as you insert the syringe into the bottle of solution, suggest that you push the plunger with ALL YOUR MIGHT to get rid of the air inside the syringe. YES, push with your fingers and push it till you feel the pain at your finger tip. But beware, if you push too hard, your syringe will push against the bottle, and air will get into your bottle and form BIG bubbles. So be gentle yet firm. Yes, it's quite a feat trying to accomplish the perfect solution extraction from the bottle.

And when you extract the solution, pull back the plunger slowly and steadily. And tada~ the perfect extraction!

Just like previously - Pinch, jab & release... Slowly releasing the solution by pushing the plunger, don't rush it. I find that by slowly pushing it will be a lot less painful. After you think you've got all the solution into you, think again... now you need to really push the plunger as hard as you can ensuring all the solution is totally released. Then count backward from 10, 9, 8, 7.... 2, 1. Slowly pull out the syringe. Ah~ That's it for the day.

I don't remember doctor telling me to lay down for a while after the jab, but that's what I will do. Give yourself a gentle tummy rub as you lay down - this gives you a "happy" feeling, sort of a comforting feeling :)

New jab starts...

Ok, had my first Suprefact jab yesterday. It was a bit of a mess. Since the jab this time is using the normal syringes, I have to hold it at the right position making sure there is no air bubble - which I failed miseably! I had to redo it a couple of times to make sure there is no air bubble. I have no idea how the nurse can get it right in the first place! At first it was just one small bubble, so tried the different techniques the nurse taught me to get rid of the air bubble... but it goes worst! I had to redo it all over again and still there is one small tiniest bubble! ARGh!!! So... in the end, I had to enroll the help of hubby. He is much better than me in this. HAHAHA.

Anyway, we got it all under control. So I jab myself... as before... PINCH & JAB! But maybe because this time I'm a bit more careful since it's syringe-type. I would prefer the pen type at anytime because it's less messy, easier to manage & most of all the needle is shorter! Anyway.... I pinch as hard as I can but when it's JAB time, the needle just won't go in. Maybe I'm afraid of needles already??? OH NO!!!!! I hope not because there are 16 more jabs to go...

So I brace myself, and slowly jab myself... And it HURTS! Since it's 0.5ml, it's a lot of liquid and it flows really slowly. It felt like ages! I was a bit scared I guess, so I was doing it slowly & inserting the liquid steadily at turtle speed I guess.

Anyway.... I did it! It wasn't pleasent but I shall prevail!!!!

Where is my swab? (29/12/2009)

Last night, I slept at... 9pm?! Hahahaha... No idea why, but I was extremely exhausted yesterday when I got home.

Woke up happy & fresh this morning - after a few sneeze on the bed!

After cleaning up & dressed up for the day, I went downstairs to have my jab. BUT - where is my alcohol swab!! OH NO!!! I checked the fridge (even the freezer), the car, the bed, the bag.. nope still couldn't find it... Oh well, will just have to use tissue + filtered clean water to swab myself.

Today is left jab - the painful side. So I pinched myself HARDER..... And it works! I think I'm getting better at the jab. Having said that, I have more "blue-black" patches all over my fat tummy now. I did asked the nurse if it was normal, she said it's normal and it's ok as long as it's not swollen or harden. Oh well, so nothing to worry...

Just to update about the alcohol swab - I found it. I think it fell off my bag when I placed it in the cupboard in office. I found it :) and hopefully after tomorrow's visit, I won't be needing it.

Merry Christmas (25/12/2009)

Today is the last of the 5-day jabbing day! And I have extra pair of eyes - my mom, my sis and my bro-in-law. They witnessed my last jab. I realised that jabbing on the right is less painful as compare to on the left, I wonder why. So today is RIGHT day, so today is smooth as silk - no "ouch"

Last jab, last meds.... so now I just have to wait for 28th to go back to the clinic. Seems that Dr F will be on leave and there will be a new doctor visiting from KL clinic - whom I shall refer as Dr S.

For now... it's Christmas season, let's sit back and relax.... Merry Christmas everyone!

Christmas Eve (24/12/2009)

Today is Christmas Eve - tomorrow is the day that Christ was born in Bethlehem more than 2 thousand years ago. I am forever grateful for this.

I am thankful also that today is the eve of my last jab :)

This morning woke up, looking at the sky outside thinking, "Hmmm.. it's still dark out there." Then I asked hubby about the time, "It's 8.30." I opened my eyes wide - oh no! I need to jab by 8am!!! In my peejays, I ran downstairs to the fridge and grabbed my box. And ran back into my bedroom.

Thinking to myself: remember the steps, don't miss any. And lovely hubby decided to take pictures of me jabbing! Hahaha, I haven't seen the photographs yet so I wonder how it looks like from a different perspective.

Well, you see, I just woke up (without brushing my teeth or washing up), obviously the pinching part is a little lack of strength! Hahahah... As I pinched, I jab, "Ouch!" The needle went in 1mm perhaps, and I pulled it out. (Surprised that at this time hubby hasn't fainted yet) Again I pinched harder, and JAB!!!!!!!! Phew, this time it went in well. Counting backward from 10... and release........ Ah~ a sigh of relief.

Tomorrow is the last dosage, and my sis & my mom will be around tomorrow. Not sure if they are ready to see me jab myself! Hahaha! After tomorrow, I will be returning to Dr F on 28 December. He mentioned that I will be scheduled for Follicle Scan. So let's pray that all the jab is fruitful!

Extra note: I just browsed through some of the photographs that hubby took this morning, I realised I have "blue-black" marks surrounding the jab area. I wonder if I did it right???

Piece of cake! (23/12/2009)

8am - time for jab! Oh well, recalling yesterday's horror pain. I paused for a moment before I do a jab-half-way incident again. Now now... sit down.. PINCH HARDER (hubby says the harder the pinch, the lesser pain)... So I pinched harder!!!!!! And JAB!!!!! (Hey, it works. My pinching numbed the surrounding fat!) Count backward... then release~

Today I can really call it - PIECE OF CAKE! (Give myself a pat on the shoulder)